older – Page 2 – Wordgag ツ

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Jan 30, 2026

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Jan 29, 2026

I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

Jan 29, 2026

The older I get, the more I appreciate people who pretend not to notice me when they see me out in public.

Jan 29, 2026

Some people get weird as they get older. Not me, though. I’ve always been weird.

Jan 29, 2026

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

Jan 29, 2026

“Age is just a number!” Yeah, the older I get, the number I feel.

Jan 29, 2026

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Jan 28, 2026

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

Jan 28, 2026

Getting older is sexy. You moan more.

Jan 28, 2026

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

Jan 28, 2026

When exactly does wisdom kick in? I feel like I’m just getting older.

Jan 23, 2026

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

Jan 23, 2026

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Jan 23, 2026

I can’t wait to see my older sister so she can point out I have more gray hair than she does.

Jan 23, 2026

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

Jan 23, 2026

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Jan 22, 2026

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

Jan 22, 2026

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Jan 22, 2026

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Jan 22, 2026

If you’re 20, please stop saying you’re tired. I have bananas older than you.

Jan 22, 2026

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Jan 22, 2026

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

Jan 22, 2026

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

Jan 22, 2026

As you get older, nothing loses its sting more than an authority figure saying they are disappointed in you. Like, I don’t know what to tell you, dude, we can’t both live in the prison of your expectations.

Jan 22, 2026

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Jan 22, 2026

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

Jan 21, 2026

One thing I have noticed about getting older is having to stop for a short nap halfway through scrolling down to my year of birth when completing online forms.

Jan 21, 2026

I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

Jan 21, 2026

Milk teeth are wasted on children. A new set of teeth would be a lot more useful when you’re older.

Jan 21, 2026

Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

Jan 21, 2026

I used to think that the older you get, the wiser and more self-confident you become. I now know that you just get tired more quickly.

Jan 21, 2026

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

Jan 21, 2026

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Jan 21, 2026

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Jan 21, 2026

You can’t keep running away from your problems, you’re getting older and your kids are getting faster.

Jan 21, 2026

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.

Jan 20, 2026

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

Jan 20, 2026

As you get older you become all of the seven dwarfs.

Jan 20, 2026

When I was a kid I would say I’m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.

Jan 20, 2026