Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I hate when I’m typing away, expecting autocorrect to have my back, and I look down and just see awjdbdmkskan.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

God creating the duck: waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Some parents are blessed with amazing kids and others have kids that decide to learn the trumpet.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Gender is a just a scam made by big bathroom companies to sell more bathrooms.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I think I’m closer to retirement than to a relationship.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,955

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,955

Updated

1 second ago

Users Online

3,454

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Making waves on Twitch:

Mike is short for Micycle.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?

Trending via TikTok:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Seen just now on WeChat:

A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

Just landed via YouTube:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Going viral on Threads:

Even in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with late stage 40’s.

Shared recently on Telegram:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

Home » Funny Patriotism Quotes

Funny patriotism quotes

New funny patriotism quotes 👇

For even more funny patriotism quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny patriotism quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,955

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,955

Updated

1 second ago

Users Online

3,451

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Nothing tops a plain pizza.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t tell me to trust my gut. Thats where I put my snacks. Clearly that’s where I’m the weakest.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

Seen just now on TikTok:

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

Seen just now on Threads:

Just once, I’d love to underthink a situation.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Live now on Discord:

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

Just shared via Discord:

When I eat rotisserie chicken, I like to pretend that I’m performing an autopsy.

Making waves on Telegram:

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

Just shared via Pinterest:

100% of all babіes are unemployed. Pathetіc.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴