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53 Funny store quotes

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

3 months ago

Paycheck hit. I’m at Michaels Arts & Crafts supply store telling them to bring out Michael.

3 months ago

Deleted all dating apps, instead I’m just going to walk into a grocery store and look confused.

3 months ago

Why there is always a kid crying when I go to the store? Dude, you aren’t the one paying for it. Stop!

3 months ago

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

3 months ago

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

3 months ago

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

3 months ago

IKEA is like the Hotel California of furniture stores.

3 months ago

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

3 months ago

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

3 months ago

He’s making a list, he’s checking it twice, he’s leaving the store, he still forgot milk.

3 months ago

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

3 months ago

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

3 months ago

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

3 months ago

I’m gonna put “CEO of Blockbuster Video” on my resume because who are they gonna call to confirm?

3 months ago

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

3 months ago

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

3 months ago

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

3 months ago

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

3 months ago

As a sales clerk, you want to shout after some people as they leave the store: “Are you sure you’ve really REALLY touched everything?”

3 months ago