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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

It’s strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

New cinephile technique “method watching” — when you watch a movie and then act and talk like the main character for 2 months.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Honk shuah. Sleep on that thang!

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

If I ever have a daughter, I’m going to call her Erica, but spell it Airwrecka.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

Spotted on YouTube:

Self-help books are brain rot. Return to fiction.

Making waves on Telegram:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Trending via Discord:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Spotted on Twitch:

Nothing is complicated when you’re simple-minded like me.

Going viral on TikTok:

Touched a tree and accidentally absorbed 400 years of wisdom and 2 squirrel secrets.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It’s like Facebook in real life.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Trending via X:

Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

Trending via Reddit:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

31 Funny strangers quotes

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Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Twitch this month:

Ummmm, no, I don’t watch ‘Instagram Reels.’ I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source.

50 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t wanna meet your family, bring my plate to the car.

42 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m going crazy, y’all. Coming with me?

79 shares on Telegram this month:

Traded my Fitbit in for a Sitbit.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

As I get older, I’m understanding why everything needs to be done before 12 p.m.

90 shares on X this month:

Cleaning your glasses is like changing from 360p to 1080p.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

I want you to know that whatever problems you’re having, I’m hear to ‘like’ them.

70 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

15 shares on Threads this month:

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

They need to increase life expectancy so I can squeeze in another mid-life crisis.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a crush should be considered a form of self-harm.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

May the Force be with you… especially in Monday meetings.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I always do my best sleeping in the 10 minutes before my alarm goes off.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Got my mind on my money and my money is nowhere to be found.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,329

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I love how these vegans still drink water. That’s a fish’s house!

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I have determined there is no quiet way to get a pan out of a cabinet in the morning.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

Seen just now on Messenger:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Watching 2+ movies a day to prevent a thought from happening.

Just shared via Discord:

If you think I’m evil, wait until you meet the man who made me this way.

Going bananas on Threads:

Tattoos are a great convo starter. So as an introvert, I kinda regret getting them.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Just landed via X:

Men can be sorted into two camps: the ones who get haircuts way before they need them, and the ones who wait until people in their lives are complaining.

Going viral on Slack:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Making waves on Snapchat:

When you’re dead, you don’t know that you’re dead. But it’s hard for those around you. It’s the same when you’re stupid.

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