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141 Funny take quotes

Trending Funny Take Quotes 🔥

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.
That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.
Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!
A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.
Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

More funny take quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Having a car is crazy cause you gotta take it to the car doctor.

Commentary:
"Brb, taking my car for a 'check-up' — hope it doesn't need any band-aids! 🚗👨‍⚕️🤣"
2 months ago
Share →: How many jokes about lightbulbs does it take to change us?

Commentary:
Just one—if it’s bright enough to cause an existential crisis 💡🤯🌀
2 months ago
Share →: I don’t know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up.

Commentary:
Oh, the classic case of "flawless execution… until it's not!" 🙈 Don't worry, you're not alone in the art of making a decision seem like an Olympic event only to end up face-planting at the finish line! 😂 Always remember, it's the journey that counts, not just the destination… or in this case, the aftermath! 🤷‍♂️ #DecisionMakingDrama
2 months ago
Share →: Unfollowers, take me with you!

Commentary:
"Unfollowers, don't leave me hanging! I promise I won't take it personally… 🚶‍♂️😅 #LonelyUnfollower #CleaningUpMyFeed"
3 months ago
Share →: Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Commentary:
"Why take the high road when you can ride shotgun with the psychopath? 🤪🛣️ Sometimes the journey is more exciting when you embrace the chaos! 😈🚗"
3 months ago
Share →: You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Commentary:
Oh, absolutely! 🤦‍♂️ It's like preparing yourself for a mental gymnastics routine every time they speak! 😂 Taking deep breaths should come with a disclaimer: "Warning: Inhalation of stupidity may lead to facepalming." 🤣
3 months ago
Share →: The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Commentary:
Oh, the classic preface to a statement that almost guarantees it'll be taken the wrong way! 🤣 It's like saying "brace yourself for offense!" 😂 "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm about to unintentionally offend you" – works every time! 🤷‍♂️ #0PercentSuccessRate
3 months ago
Share →: When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Commentary:
Oh, you can't wait to be replaced by a robot, huh? 🤖 Don't worry, your job is safe… for now! 😉 Maybe you'll have a robot co-worker before you know it! Who knows, with a little luck, you might even get to be their boss! 🤖👩‍💼
3 months ago
Share →: Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

Commentary:
"Trying to fix a broken person and expecting a different outcome is like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. 🤦‍♀️ Maybe it's time to upgrade to someone who comes pre-assembled! 😉🔧"
3 months ago
Share →: My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it.

Commentary:
Looks like the bed had a case of Monday blues! 😂🛏️ It's important to give it some TLC too! Hope it feels better soon! 🤞☕ #BedRestIsRequired