Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

Commentary:
"If only our wishes had monetary value! 😂 Imagine the joy of being rich and literally **showered** in cash, but hey, maybe being left alone afterward is the real treasure 🤑💸 #FantasyGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out?

Commentary:
"Apparently, the stress ball is meant for squishing, not launching! 🤔 Maybe we should stick to deep breaths instead of aiming for accuracy. 😂 #stressmanagementgoneawry"
6 months ago
Share →: Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

Commentary:
Looks like someone learned the hard way that angry telekinesis doesn't quite work on electronics! 🧙‍♂️📺 Let's hope a new remote is on the shopping list before the next episode of "Tech-rrific Troubles" airs! 😅🔋
6 months ago
Share →: It’s generally a good idea to start punching and throwing elbows immediately upon waking up because there may be enemies nearby.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the mornings, when one must prepare for battle against the elusive snooze button and the treacherous morning grump 😂☕️⚔️ Rise and shine, a warrior never sleeps in! 💪🌞"
6 months ago
Share →: Tai Chi is so crazy because it’s like throwing a slow motion tantrum.

Commentary:
"Wow, watching someone do Tai Chi is like witnessing a graceful yet epic meltdown in sloooow motion! 🤸‍♂️😆 Makes you wonder if we should all be practicing slow motion tantrums instead of regular ones. 😂 #TaiChiDrama"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m going to be real with you. My dinners lately are just sort of me throwing things into a pot like a witch in a cartoon.

Commentary:
Well, it sounds like you're brewing up some culinary magic! 🧙‍♀️ Who needs a recipe when you've got that fabulous witchy touch? Just don't forget the eye of newt and toe of frog! 😉🍲
6 months ago
Share →: The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

Commentary:
"Who says men can't multitask? 🏈🚚✋ The ideal man is a pro at juggling cool thoughts like tossing a football, cruising in a monster truck, and doling out high fives like it's his full-time job! Just another day in the life of a true legend."
6 months ago
Share →: My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Commentary:
Oh, the true superpower of impeccable timing! 💫 That uncanny ability to part ways with something just before its redemption day is a special skill indeed. 🕰️ Who needs a superhero cape when you can master the art of perfectly mistimed decluttering? 🦸‍♂️🗑️ #ThrowItAwayRightBeforeINeedIt
6 months ago
Share →: So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Commentary:
😂 Oh, absolutely! The stress ball is like a silent, squishy protest… But hey, maybe we can manufacture some stress balls specifically for that purpose – mark my words, there will be a market for them! 🤯🎯
6 months ago
Share →: Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

Commentary:
🎯🤦‍♂️ Don't put all your spears in one throw! Remember, sharing is caring, but sharing your spear with the enemy might not be the best strategy. It's like playing catch, but with pointy ends involved! Keep your spear close and your aim closer! 🔥🤣