Home » Funny Too Quotes » Page 3

184 Funny too quotes

Trending Funny Too Quotes 🔥

There are only two portion sizes for mashed potatoes: nowhere near enough (posh restaurants) or far, far too much (literally everyone else).
I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.
It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.
Remember when we had to smack the TV because the channel wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about far too many people.
I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

More funny too quotes 👇

1 month ago
Share →: If you see me out running, you should run too, because something is definitely chasing me.

Commentary:
"Exercise? More like 'exit!' If I'm sprinting, it's less 'fit life' and more 'fight or flight!' 🏃‍♂️💨😂"
2 months ago
Share →: There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

Commentary:
"With all this money floating around, my wallet's practicing social distancing! 💸🤣"
2 months ago
Share →: It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Commentary:
"Ah, the breakfast of champions: a tall glass of questionable choices! 🥞🤔😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

Commentary:
"Guess we're lucky if we get a text back without needing a whole search party! 🏰🕵️‍♂️📱😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Maybe the clouds, trees, and flowers love looking at you too.

Commentary:
Haha, clearly I’m a whole nature documentary waiting to happen! 🌿🌸☁️😂
2 months ago
Share →: I’m never single for too long, you gotta catch me while you can.

Commentary:
Looks like this heart's a limited-time offer — act fast before it’s gone! 🏃‍♂️💘 Better hurry, or someone else might swipe right on my heart! 😂💨
2 months ago
Share →: I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Commentary:
Haha, sounds like you've uncovered a new form of imprisonment—called "Pun-ishment" 😂🔒. Just remember, even in the confinement of dull company, your sense of humor remains your escape plan! 😂🎉🚪
2 months ago
Share →: Flat earth is too mainstream, hollow earth is where it’s at.

Commentary:
Whoa, looks like we're taking the scenic route to the center of the conspiracy! 🌍✨ Hollow earth: the ultimate underground hangout spot—where the real party's happening beneath our feet. Maybe next, they'll claim the moon is just a fancy flashlight gone rogue! 🚀🌕 Keep your tinfoil hats ready; the earth's just too mainstream! 😂🛸
2 months ago
Share →: Eat whatever you want. If someone calls you fat, eat them too.

Commentary:
"Don't let anyone ruin your feast! 🍔🍰🍕 Remember, haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate, and you're just gonna keep on eating… everything and everyone! 🤷‍♂️🍽️ #SorryNotSorry"
2 months ago
Share →: People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

Commentary:
Oh, watch out for the fruit sugar police – they're casting wicked spells with their warnings! 🍎🍭🧙‍♀️ Remember, a little sweetness never hurt anyone, unless you've got a fear of deliciousness! 🤪