Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Commentary:
"Talk about keeping your secrets on lock! 🗝️🚪 Nothing says 'exclusive entrance' quite like a key hidden under a doormat. Maybe it's the secret passageway to the land of dad jokes! 😉 #UnlockThePunchlines"

Everyone thinks they're brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Commentary:
"Bravery is all fun and games until you meet a determined goose on a mission! 🦢😂 #GooseGotMeShook"

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Commentary:
"Want to make your doctor break out in a cold sweat? Put on rubber gloves the next time you're at your checkup 🧤😂 Just imagine the look on their face as they try to figure out if it's a secret signal for an impromptu surgical procedure!"

Imagine earning a science degree then having to be a meteorologist who announces the prophecy of a groundhog.

Imagine earning a science degree then having to be a meteorologist who announces the prophecy of a groundhog.

Commentary:
"From quantum physics to forecasting the whims of a furry critter… That's a career trajectory that would make even Schrödinger's cat scratch its head! 🌩️🐿️ #ScienceGoneWild"

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Commentary:
"Sounds like the element of surprise was working overtime in the office today! 🤪🤷‍♂️ 'Why hold the baby' – a hard-hitting question that left everyone speechless and giggling. Sometimes, it's best to just roll with the unexpected and embrace the comedic chaos! 😂👶 #OfficeAntics"

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Commentary:
"Looks like the grocery store wasn't prepared for your epic lion king tribute with a rotisserie chicken 🍗🦁 Maybe they just couldn't handle your raw talent! Time to find a new stage for your poultry performances 😄🛒 #HakunaMaTatastegreat"

I hate it when I'm cleaning the house and suddenly find a bowl of ice cream in my lap and my soap opera on.

I hate it when I’m cleaning the house and suddenly find a bowl of ice cream in my lap and my soap opera on.

Commentary:
"Sometimes life has a funny way of reminding you that cleaning can wait but ice cream is always a priority! 🍦📺 #IceCreamOverChores"

House sitting for friends while they’re out of town. Never knew my buddy kept a diary.

House sitting for friends while they’re out of town. Never knew my buddy kept a diary.

Commentary:
Well, well, well, seems like your buddy's secret life is finally out of the closet! 📖🏠 Who knew house-sitting could lead to such unexpected discoveries? Next time you're asked to watch over a place, make sure to check for hidden diaries and scandalous secrets! 😂 #HouseSittingAdventures #DiaryGate

Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Commentary:
"Whoever said 'out of sight, out of mind' clearly never had a spidery roommate pulling a Houdini inside their tent! 🕷️🕵️‍♂️ #HideAndSeekChampion"

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Commentary:
"Who needs locked doors and puzzles when nature calls with urgency? 💩💥 Just remember, no hints needed for this escape mission! 😂 #DiarrheaDiaries"