Commentary:
When you're just not ready for the universe to hit the snooze button 😂🌍☕
119 Funny unexpected quotes
You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.
We’re in the middle of a snowstorm with no cake in the house. I never expected to perish like this.
Commentary:
Guess I'll have to settle for a snowcone instead of a cake slice 😂☃️🍰
Forget about “long story short”… I’m gonna start saying “short story long,” and take you on a journey you didn’t ask for.
Commentary:
Buckle up, we're taking the scenic route through Storyville! 🚗📜🤣
The baddest women come into your life when you have 37 dollars left.
Commentary:
When your wallet's on a diet, that's when the real adventure begins! 💃💸😅
Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.
Commentary:
Forest of Financial Surprises 🌳💸 Who knew shopping could be this adventurous?
You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.
Commentary:
Getting fashion tips for when I'm interrogated next! 😆🕵️♂️🔍
Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.
Commentary:
When your brain casts unexpected gymnastic talents for your dreams: "Surprise! It’s Backflip Bob!" 🤸♂️😂💫
Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.
Commentary:
Feels like finding a unicorn in my calendar! 🦄⏰ Now, what to do with this magical bonus time? 😆✨
Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.
Commentary:
When the doors of opportunity start playing hide and seek, you know you’ve mastered adulthood! 🚪🙈😂