Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

My advice to young people to prepare for getting older is to start stretching immediately.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

That beeping of the parking assistant when you get too close to other cars. I’d like that for people.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

“This too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,676

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

You’re never too old to shout, “Mooooo,” when you drive past some cows.

Spotted on TikTok:

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

Breaking via Instagram:

How about hold me as tight as you’re holding onto that grudge?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

Seen just now on Messenger:

There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.

Trending via Threads:

Airplanes are so weird because how does a giant metal box stay in the air like that, and why am I craving tomato juice?

Trending via Slack:

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

Spotted on Messenger:

If you can’t handle me at my worst, then honestly, you’re missing out because that’s when my jokes and bits get really, really good.

Trending via YouTube:

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Spotted on WeChat:

Do you think protein wants to be in all these things?

Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

1 week ago

Playful text about youth humor: "What time is it?" joke still popular among young people.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, it looks like the timeless classic comeback of "what time is it/time for you to get a watch" is still ticking strong among the youths ⌚😂! Who knew that telling time could also tell us so much about Generation Z's sass levels! Keep clockin' those witty retorts, young ones! ⏰🕰️

being, communication, happy, humor, report, slang, still, time, used, watch, youth

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on TikTok this month:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

15 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t like who I become when I’m watching someone Google something less efficiently than I would myself.

36 shares on Snapchat this month:

Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

80 shares on Slack this month:

I love replying “Need him” when someone posts their boyfriend on their Instagram story.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

48 shares on YouTube this month:

Really hate when I’m watching a movie, and I can see that they are acting.

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

46 shares on Twitch this month:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t see guys traveling around on those seesaw-type push carts on railroad tracks anymore.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s an app for the people who say they’re not seeking some form of validation here. It’s called a diary.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The easiest diet is lack of money. You don’t have to do anything.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

When I get filthy rich, I will stay humble by continuing to use grocery bags as bathroom trash bags.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

To everyone I offended this year: do better next year, so I don’t have to do it again.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,749

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Forget cheating, that’s young people’s shit. I’m ready to get married and have an affair.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Relationship Status: just tried to pet my dog and he turned his head so I pretended I was reaching for a leaf that was next to him.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Do you enjoy addiction, anxiety, and urinating? Then coffee may be the beverage for you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

I may have bags under my eyes, but they’re Versace.

Making waves on Twitch:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Just landed via Slack:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Spotted on Discord:

Worst feeling is playing a game and having nobody to talk to about it.

Trending via Threads:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Just landed via Pinterest:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Fun prank: make people study for 16 years, and then don’t give them jobs.

Trending via Threads:

The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that.

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