Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.
  • When someone says “I don’t want a relationship right now” the “at least not with you” is silent.
  • Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.
  • Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.
  • Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.
  • Out of sheer boredom, I opened the front door and rang the doorbell. I was so happy.