Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Talk about taking Halloween to new heights! Who knew the key to being a sexy kite was just a tampon away? 🎃🪁 Now that's what I call creative thinking and some serious string skills! 😂 #HalloweenGoals"

costume, creativity, Halloween, humor, i, just, kite, prank, put, sexy, tampon

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54 shares on Twitch this month:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

Best thing about staying in an Airbnb is trying to see what’s in that one locked closet.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

From now on, I’m gonna tell guests that I made my house especially messy just for their visit. It was hard, but I got it done.

12 shares on Threads this month:

My life is constantly oscillating between “must save money” and “you only live once”.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

How does a government that takes 40% of everyone’s money end up being trillions in debt?

19 shares on WeChat this month:

Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

41 shares on Reddit this month:

People who quit their jobs before having a backup job lined up ain’t scared of nothing.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I’m going to need to rewatch Idiocracy to see what happens next.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

About to form my very first opinion.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Going viral on Telegram:

Getting a wife is very powerful, because you get a personal psychic that will tell you things like, “Your keys are in the gray pants in the hamper,” and “He will ultimately betray you.”

Just landed via Facebook:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

Shared recently on X:

Grant me the supernatural ability to change the things I cannot accept.

Spotted on Telegram:

Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

Trending via Slack:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

Trending via YouTube:

Hate when I get halfway there and have to go back for my teeth.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I glance over at my boyfriend, and he’s just looking at Google Maps, scrolling around.

Going viral on Messenger:

Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t know what i’m going to be for Halloween, so I’m probably just going to put in a tampon and go as a sexy kite.

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t know what i’m going to be for Halloween, so I’m probably just going to put in a tampon and go as a sexy kite.

Keep the laugh going 😂

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨