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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

806 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,968

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,968

10 minutes ago

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

It’s funny how it’s often easier to access academic resources illegally, even when you have university library access.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Just landed via Facebook:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Making waves on Threads:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Just shared via WeChat:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

Just shared via Slack:

I told a joke during a Zoom meeting today. Nobody laughed. It turns out I’m not even remotely funny.

Going viral on Telegram:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Going viral on Slack:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

Shared recently on X:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

I handed in my exam blank so that the teacher has more time to celebrate Christmas with her family.

6 months ago

I handed in my exam blank so that the teacher has more time to celebrate Christmas with her family.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🎄📝 When you hand in a blank exam, you're not just giving your teacher the gift of time – you're also giving them the gift of a good laugh! Who knew spreading holiday cheer could be so creative and daring? Just hoping your teacher won't celebrate by assigning a makeup test after Christmas break! 😉 #HolidaySpirit #CheekyStudent

blank, celebrate, celebration, Christmas, exam, family, handed, humor, i, procrastination, teacher, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

806 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,968

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,968

10 minutes ago

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Female breasts are nature’s anti-stress balls. The irony is that they are connected to the biggest stress-inducing device.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Just emerged from my Y2K bunker. Everybody okay?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I wear black because it’s slimming. Exercise is also slimming, but like I said, I wear black.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I wanna stand with you on a mountain and throw you into the sea, or whatever Savage Garden was on about.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

Spotted on Discord:

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Reported on Pinterest:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

Just shared via Instagram:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Reported on WhatsApp:

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

Trending via YouTube:

Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

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