I have a lot to offer! Most of it’s bad, but it’s still a lot.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.