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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Several of my internal organs hurt, but I’m 100% sure it’s not my body trying to tell me something.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Females be cheating in healthy relationships, but are faithful in toxic ones.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

This year I’d like an advent calendar with 24 different tranquilizers.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Just because talking is for you doesn’t mean that starting a podcast is.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

On the one hand, I’d love to look sexy in a bikini. On the other hand, there’s cake.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

First date idea: we deactivate your Instagram.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,368

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

Going viral on Threads:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Spotted on Instagram:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Shared recently on Slack:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

Broadcasted on X:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Just landed via Twitch:

For whom the doom scrolls!

Trending via Slack:

Recovering people pleasers will be like, “I’m in my villain era!” and it’s just politely drawing healthy boundaries.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Going bananas on Slack:

Living solo: where pants are optional, and snacks are unlimited.

Just shared via Reddit:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

1 week ago

Playful quote about the struggle to look cute in mirrors but funny in photos.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤔💁‍♀️ "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the cutest of them all? Wait, what do you mean I transform into a baked potato in photos? 🥔📸 Maybe I need to switch my selfie game to 'bake' to perfection! 😂 #BakedPotatoAesthetic"

baked, baked potato, cute, humor, i, mirror, pictures, potato, question, self-image

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Facebook this month:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

42 shares on Instagram this month:

Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

94 shares on YouTube this month:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

24 shares on X this month:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I’ll eventually be able to get back in it.

82 shares on X this month:

Adulting has stunned me into silence. I have no thoughts, no remarks and no commentary at the moment.

64 shares on Twitch this month:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

84 shares on Instagram this month:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

I have no idea how dishwasher tablets work. I’ve already taken five of them, and I still don’t feel like doing the dishes!

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

19 folks are currently checking 👀

After ejaculation, men automatically realize that everything is vanity upon vanity.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

People will be like “Nobody cares about your Spotify Wrapped,” and then post a picture of their baby.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss making out in public and making people feel uncomfortable.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Those 8 hours at work go by quickly when you call off.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a good thing that happens.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,296

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Maybe this is the Windows software update that changes everything for me.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Yesterday, thieves broke into my home. They searched everywhere and found nothing. They beat me up, telling me to work harder.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Never wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.

Freshly posted on X:

When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.

Just shared via Slack:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Spotted on TikTok:

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

Trending via Reddit:

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Just landed via Instagram:

My style isn’t even my real style yet. Just wait till my budget matches my vision.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Going bananas on Slack:

I just borrowed some money from a cash app, now I’m about to uninstall it.

Going viral on Reddit:

Twerk unto others as you would have them twerk unto you.

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