Trendy Funny Quotes

  • You’re always bitching about your alarm clock, but put yourself in his shoes. The first thing he sees in the morning is your face.
  • Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.
  • That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.
  • It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.
  • That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.
  • Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.