I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

“Get a life!” Have you seen some of the lives out there?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?