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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Can anyone recommend some good places for somebody just getting into visiting?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Can everyone log off? I need some time alone right now.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Zara makes clothing for occasions that don’t exist.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

The fact that I procrastinate and still get the job done is the reason I still procrastinate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Just landed via Telegram:

My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

Trending via YouTube:

Your child learning to say mommy is when your life begins and ends.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Introverts don’t recharge with sleep, we recharge by being left completely alone for 3–5 business days.

Just landed via Reddit:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Going viral on Discord:

All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Trending via Facebook:

The homie who’s ultimately just a pawn in your grand scheme.

Live now on Reddit:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Trending via Messenger:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

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I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”
Download image ↓

Commentary:
😂🌅 Oh, the sun of youth, forever setting on our nostalgia trips! 🌟 It's like we've got a permanent case of FOMO for our past selves. But hey, at least we can always watch the sunrise of new memories! ☀️ Embrace the moment, even when you're missing who you were then!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on WeChat this month:

My wife is pretty excited about going away this weekend so I’m not sure she knows I’m coming with her.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

At my age, “getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what you came in there for.

93 shares on Facebook this month:

Me: I love you more than a flower loves the sun. Him: I love you more than a teenager loves his phone.

35 shares on X this month:

I suck at flirting, I end up arguing with them instead.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

12 shares on TikTok this month:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

75 shares on Slack this month:

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Men make money to be with a woman, but women make money to not have to be with a man. Clock it!

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Really just want to meet someone who knows what songs not to talk over.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing that I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,380

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Shaved my entire body for this post, just in case.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

You truly don’t realize how young 20 is until you’re not 20 anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

“I’ve had cigarettes that were better than entire years of my life.”

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Some days you’re the bat, some days you’re the ball.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Caesar, looking shocked: “Is it bring your knife to work day or something?”

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Just shared via TikTok:

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Does anyone know what to do, like in general?

Making waves on Snapchat:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

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