Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.
  • Never trust a wet fart.
  • Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.
  • My parents still haven’t apologized for making me ugly.
  • Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!
  • Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.