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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer to the end you get, the faster it goes.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

In case of a disaster, women and children are being evacuated first so men can think about a solution in peace.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,242

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Live now on Reddit:

I love being left to my own devices. It’s like yeah, these are my devices.

Trending via Twitch:

It’s really sad that April Fools is the only day people are appropriately skeptical of stuff they read on the internet.

Going viral on X:

Someday I’ll learn how to emotion like a proper human.

Trending via Pinterest:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

Breaking via Instagram:

Some of you need to be visited by the ghost of ‘Quit emailing me so much before Christmas.’

Going viral on Messenger:

I’m just a girl, standing in front of a Monday, asking it to be a Friday.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.
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Commentary:
Family vacations: the perfect blend of love, chaos, and questionable decisions. 🌴🚗😅 So if you haven't sworn off family trips at least once, are you even doing it right? 😂 #FamilyBondingAtItsFinest

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Discord this month:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

80 shares on TikTok this month:

With great power comes a great electricity bill.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

50 shares on Threads this month:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

24 shares on YouTube this month:

Just the owls and I out here enjoying the breeze amongst the trees.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The role I play at family gatherings is that of the cousin that doesn’t show up anymore.

79 shares on X this month:

If my memory gets any worse, I’ll be able to plan my own surprise party.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is the only place you argue with CEOs and heads of states while sleeping in the kitchen.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Hold on, let me overthink this.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My kids want to know what’s for dinner, like they’re going to be happy with the answer.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,318

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

I forgot how weird November is. There’s no afternoon; it’s just night after 3 p.m.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Stop rushing in the morning. You’re starting your day in panic mode.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Honestly, I don’t even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I’m like “I guess this is what we’re doing now.”

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Spotted on Discord:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Just landed via Threads:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Growing old is a process of saying “it’s probably nothing,” with increasing frequency and increasingly being wrong.

Spotted on Reddit:

Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.

Shared recently on TikTok:

If white men can’t jump, how do you explain Super Mario?

Shared recently on Telegram:

I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

Just shared via Pinterest:

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

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