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Commentary:
"Ah, the magical transformation coffee brings – turning mere mortals into unbeatable superheroes of the morning! ☕️💪 Embrace the power of caffeine and unleash your inner awesome – you got this!"

awesome, coffee, day, going, humor, i, know, listen, morning, morning routine, motivation, routine, self-awareness, today

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

0

2 months ago

dream, getting, humor, job, paid, relaxation, sleep, work
Is it cool if I come into your life and just never leave, like a stray cat?

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2 months ago

cat, cool, humor, i, intrusion, just, leave, life, never, pet, relationship, stray, stray cat
Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

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2 months ago

anger, annoyance, different, frustration, home, humor, own, parking, parking space, someone, space, taking, type
Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

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2 weeks ago

everyone, excited, excitement, gift, giving, holiday, humor, opinion, present, presents, sarcasm, year
Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

0

2 months ago

activity, back, family, hungry, kids, life, outdoor, outdoor activity, play, send, six, village, village life
I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

0

2 months ago

away, believe, comedy, days, ex-wife, having, humor, i, joke, nuclear, nuclear weapon, relationship, sarcasm, weapon

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on X this month:

My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

12 shares on Discord this month:

I feel like everyone who has ever had a hamster has some kind of traumatic experience with it.

32 shares on X this month:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

76 shares on Slack this month:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

42 shares on Instagram this month:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

92 shares on Threads this month:

“I need a movie where the villain actually won!” Have you tried watching the news?

21 shares on Threads this month:

Sheep to the left of me. Cows to the right. Here I am. Stuck on a bus with a view.

72 shares on X this month:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

28 shares on Facebook this month:

I wish I was a cat. No bills, no job, just meow, meow.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

One day I will start learning from my mistakes. Today is not that day. Tomorrow isn’t looking so good either.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

“I’ve had cigarettes that were better than entire years of my life.”

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

I love going “Streets are saying” before I say something I literally just made up.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

Did you know that if a unicorn and I were to race, the unicorn would likely win cause unicorns are about as real as my desire to race anything?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Trending via Facebook:

No, I don’t comment, I voodoo doll like a real adult.

Trending via Pinterest:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

Breaking via Snapchat:

In Star Wars, anyone can hop in any spaceship and knows how to fly it. I just spent 20 minutes trying to find the headlights in a rental car.

Seen just now on Discord:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Just shared via Instagram:

I’m so lazy, I let my battles pick me.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Life hack: Confuse your doctor by putting on gloves at the same time he does.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

One day you’ll find someone who’s obsessed with you. It’ll probably be a demon but that’s what it is.

Trending via Slack:

Why do people think it’s ok to ask why a person is single? I don’t ask why you’re unhappily married.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Is it cool if I come into your life and just never leave, like a stray cat?

Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨