MINNEAPOLIS—Local man Greg Walters, 42, unwittingly became the face of Planned Parenthood’s new campaign. Known for his loud “remember, I am an inspiration for birth control” proclamation, neighbors have taken to placing flyers around town with his likeness. “We’ve put Greg to good use,” said marketing lead Clara Penn. “It’s hard to look at him and not ponder life’s potential consequences.”
By all accounts, the initiative has gained traction, with many residents feeling confident about not reproducing. “Forget the statistics, just hang out with Greg for an hour,” said neighbor Jerry Spindle. “The way he organizes his box collection really hammers home the importance of thinking before you leap.” His iconic phrase reportedly saved several first dates from heading off course.
When asked about his newfound fame, Greg was confused yet oddly proud. “If my face reminds people that they have options, then I guess I’ve done my part,” he shrugged, while accidentally spilling his microwave dinner onto his pet ferret. Greg’s unintentional activism has caught on so much that there are whispers of him leading a TED Talk on ‘Unintended Heroism.’