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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Good morning. Does anyone know what is right and what is wrong?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Going to IKEA if anyone needs some meatballs.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

So many mistakes to make, so little time.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Retiring my wallet condom after two years of active duty. 87 tours with 0 combat deployments.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Babe, would it kill you to meow back?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

218 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,487

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,487

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,728

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

Just landed via Messenger:

If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.

Just shared via Reddit:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Just landed via WeChat:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

As a simulation, this all kinda sucks.

Trending via WeChat:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Going bananas on Discord:

How do you know I’m not just a figment of your imagination?

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

If you see me out running, you should run too, because something is definitely chasing me.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Just shared via Facebook:

Work from home is all fun and games until you lose grip on reality.

My motivation and me: It’s complicated.

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My motivation and me: It’s complicated.
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Commentary:
"Oh, the classic love-hate relationship between motivation and me – it's like a never-ending romantic drama series! 💔🤣 Just when you think you're on the same page, it decides to ghost you. Ah, the complexities of this rollercoaster ride called life! 🎢😅"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on Messenger this month:

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

35 shares on Threads this month:

FOMO is a summer thing. Winter is all about FOGO (fear of going out).

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

31 shares on X this month:

Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

78 shares on WeChat this month:

To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

Figure skating is so niche that sometimes I walk in the rink, and there’s an Olympic medalist there.

71 shares on Discord this month:

There’s no sadder tableau in all of humanity than the smoker’s terrarium at the airport.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

57 shares on Reddit this month:

I wish I was waking up and going to the airport.

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

Spent most of the day making sure my couch still works. So far so good.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you turn 25 years and above, there is no need to set an alarm. Your problems will wake you up by force.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I would never be comfortable delivering a baby. I can’t even remove an avocado pit without dropping it.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Why are conclusions necessary in essays? Were you not following?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

218 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,487

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,487

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,304

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

It’s actually scary how your whole life depends on how well you did as a teenager.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

When life gives you lemons, give them back and ask what the crap is all about.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

My dating era has come to an end. I’d like to thank those who participated.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

If you don’t laugh at my jokes then I will.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

An electric car is just another electric chair.

Just landed via Threads:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Trending via WeChat:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Making waves on WeChat:

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

Going bananas on Discord:

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

Making waves on Slack:

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Just shared via Discord:

Stop blaming everyone for all your problems. Pick one person you hate and blame them for everything.

Just shared via Threads:

Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

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