Wordgag 🎅

Commentary:
"Who needs a mind anyway? Losing it just adds a little excitement to life 🤪🔍 But seriously, losing your mind can be the ultimate adventure – who knows where it might end up next! 🌪️😂"

humor, i, looking, lose, mind, next, next time, not looking, search, swear, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

0

2 months ago

absolutely, child, conversation, humor, i, love, nothing, passion, talk, toddler
I’ve finally found out what chronology is. And it’s about time.

0

2 months ago

chronology, discovery, found, humor, time, understanding, wit, wordplay
Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

0

2 months ago

assessment, humor, just, personality, personality test, results, self-discovery, test, uh oh
I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

0

2 months ago

every, existential, goals, humor, i, identity, just, life, life goals, middle-aged, nostalgia, person, remember, want, wanted
38% of being a dad is sitting in a car, looking at your watch, and waiting for everybody else to come out.

0

1 month ago

being, car, dad, else, family, humor, humor quote, looking, parenting, patience, sitting, stereotype, waiting, watch
I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

0

2 months ago

convenience, frustration, going, home, humor, i, just, life, parking, point, priorities, where

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

34 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you have ever spent an hour on Twitter then you understand why there’s such an urgency to create Artificial Intelligence.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

74 shares on Reddit this month:

Maybe Baby wants to be put in the corner.

15 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Why is it spelled “camouflage” and not “ “?

100 shares on X this month:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

47 shares on Slack this month:

Another Monday that no one asked for.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Hell hath no fury like a sports bra being applied to a just showered but not 100% dry body.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

I can’t do the splits. But so far there has never been a situation where I’ve thought, “I should do the splits now.”

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Welcome to your parents’ house, where the wifi password is fEtbqP2LVp3U6Hkh

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

It’s crazy that things have got to a point where you can say, “Jurassic Park 3 is one of the better movies in the series.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

Going viral on X:

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Just shared via Messenger:

Never get in between a girl and her fries. It’s just common sense really.

Spotted on Messenger:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I really want a family… sized bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

Just landed via Twitch:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

Just landed via Facebook:

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Just landed via Twitch:

Christmas adverts: “Eat all the food! Drink all the drink! Spoil yourself! It’s Christmas!” New year adverts: “Look at what you’ve done to yourself, you fat sack of shit!”

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Next time I lose my mind I swear I’m not even going to look for it any more.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

I’ve finally found out what chronology is. And it’s about time.

Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

38% of being a dad is sitting in a car, looking at your watch, and waiting for everybody else to come out.

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨