Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • “Bye, have a great day, I’ll see you after school”, I tell the orange in my kid’s lunch.
  • I have poor night vision so I upgraded to LED headlights because it’s important to me to ensure nobody else can see either.
  • None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!
  • My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.
  • My diet was going really well until I woke up.
  • You want to know how old you really feel? Stop drinking caffeine and popping Ibuprofen. Then, just wait.