Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.
  • I wonder if Van Halen realized they were writing music just to lift weights to.
  • There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.
  • Follow me on Instagram if you want to see me post absolutely nothing for weeks.
  • My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.
  • I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.