Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

When people don’t drink coffee, it’s like, okay, but how do you solve the problem of being awake?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

They portray Pilates like it’s this cute girly thing and it’s actually training for combat.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I just feel like we shouldn’t have a new year until we get this one right.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

The older I get, I realize my mom was right, but I just didn’t like her tone.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

483 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 15, 2026

Users Online

3,561

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

Live now on Snapchat:

I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!

Making waves on WeChat:

Nobody views your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Spotted on Threads:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Just landed via Reddit:

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Trending via YouTube:

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Maybe your baby is crying because he knows you don’t have rizz.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

Shared recently on TikTok:

It’s that time of year where every jacket you choose is wrong.

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs fancy bedding when you've got a mattress for that extra *weight* in your life? 💸😴 #BudgetSleepingHacks"

advice, blanket, funny advice, humor, mattress, money, savings, sleep, sleeping, weighted, weighted blanket

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

3 months ago

anime, comparison, cultural, cultural reference, food, food humor, funny comparison, humor, just, ramen, reference, spaghetti
Dear food, either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.

2 months ago

fat, food, making, me, stop
My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

2 months ago

adulting, back, borrowing, favorite, finance, humor, money, myself, paying, paying back, personal, personal finance, self
I love mirrors because they remind me of how pretty I am.

6 days ago

am, beauty, confidence, humor, i, love, me, mirror, mirrors, pretty, reflection, remind, self-love
Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

2 months ago

adults, grow, grow up, humor, irony, maturity, people, sarcasm, seen, stop
Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

2 months ago

9pm, adulthood, age, bedtime, humor, midnight, reality, sleep, transition, welcome

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Facebook this month:

All people make me happy. Some when they come, others when they leave.

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

The best part of Thanksgiving is being with family and friends, and a vast array of pies.

52 shares on Reddit this month:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I am woman, hear me roar but also meow because I am sensitive.

78 shares on WeChat this month:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

98 shares on TikTok this month:

Turns out I like you a lot more than I originally planned.

54 shares on Instagram this month:

Men used to go to war. Now they say, “Hey, Grok.”

34 shares on Threads this month:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This sex could have been an email.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be using humor to hide pain.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Just bought a new umbrella for the person that finds it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Being alone is my favourite way of being.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Monetizing Twitter was actually the worst thing to happen to this app. Everybody rage-baiting for 23 cents.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I started my diet 2 hours ago, I’m glad that’s over.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I love being outside, just not when it’s too cold or too hot or too wet or too windy or if there are bugs.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Photos are cool because they are like now but for later.

Going viral on Discord:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I like you because we hate the same people.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Age ceases to be just a number everytime the airline announces seating queue priority.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

Going viral on X:

We’ve historically done extremely well with regime change, so this should be a piece of cake.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

Dear food, either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.

My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

I love mirrors because they remind me of how pretty I am.

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨