Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Doctors are always giving me Ibuprofen. Man, give me something I can sell.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I’m of the very strong opinion that sex ed should be taught by a woman 37 weeks into her third pregnancy, while her husband sits scrolling through his phone, and her other two children run wild.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

“Stand up for yourself!” Girl, I have low iron.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Mini skirts are so cute and fun, like, oops, my ass is out.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 19, 2026

3,573

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Trending via Telegram:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Breaking via TikTok:

Life is a highway and I’m afraid to merge.

Just landed via Twitch:

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

Breaking via YouTube:

My boss was like, “People working from home are just pretending to work,” and it’s like, dude, what do you think I’m doing in the office?

Live now on TikTok:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Just landed via YouTube:

Luckily, I realized that all this love I want to pour into someone else was actually meant for me.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

My mom asked me where I’m taking her to eat on Mother’s Day. I told her we have food at home.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Shared recently on Slack:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
📱💥 Who knew your phone was auditioning for a role in a slapstick comedy? From acrobatics to home decor rearrangement, it's a full-on performance every time it takes a tumble! Just remember, in the world of phone physics, anything can happen – except a graceful landing on the bed! 🤹‍♂️✨

awkward, awkward moment, bed, bounce, clumsy, floor, humor, knock, lamp, mishap, moment, phone, technology, throw, walls

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

61 shares on Messenger this month:

I do believe in aliens, but do they also believe in me?

94 shares on Instagram this month:

Not sure how to flirt, but I can make things awkward if you’re into that.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

The worst part of all-you-can-eat buffets are all the witnesses.

86 shares on Twitch this month:

The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.

25 shares on Slack this month:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

86 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

36 shares on Discord this month:

I’ve been dieting for a little over a week and I already gained three pounds.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Women don’t like me, so I’m going to spend all my money on a jacket.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If a billionaire is telling you to vote for someone, it’s probably in your best interest to vote for the other person.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

It used be called “talking to yourself” but the new term for it is “podcasting”.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Moving houses/apartments gotta be top 3 worst human experiences.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If they can make a nuclear reactor small enough to power a submarine, why can’t they make one for my house?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If alcohol was the one that was banned instead of weed, then a lot of people would have had memories of hungry, stoned fathers instead of angry, drunk ones.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re over 50 when you have “upstairs Ibuprofen” and “downstairs Ibuprofen”.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Did I eat too much candy today? My stomach says yes, but my heart says no.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,301

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I installed a bike rack on my car so my neighbors think I do something else besides drink.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Apparently it’s inappropriate to yell out “Shots, shots, shots, shots” while your child’s getting immunizations at the pediatrician’s office.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I bet oiling and wrapping potatoes in aluminum foil feels so good for the potato.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Nike: Just Do It! Me: I don’t want to.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

If an ice cream truck has its music on, are you supposed to pull over and let it pass like an ambulance?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

You have 8 hours remaining to create shareholder value.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

Shared recently on Slack:

“Gen Z is having less sex.” It’s always sex, sex, sex with these people.

Going bananas on Twitch:

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

Just shared via Pinterest:

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Egyptians did pretty well for a civilization that wrote entirely in emoji.

Just shared via X:

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

Freshly posted on X:

I think my type is a nice person.

Making waves on TikTok:

A hot tub is basically a big bowl of human soup.

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