Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.
  • I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.
  • I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.
  • My mom sent me a text message so long I had to refill my Adderall prescription to read it.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.
  • Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.