Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Therapy isn't cutting it, I need to throw my brain in the dishwasher for a spin cycle of clarity! 🧠🚿✨ Out with the dirty thoughts, in with the squeaky-clean ideas!"

brain, dishwasher, health, humor, i, mental, mental health, need, relief, run, stress, stress relief, therapy

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

4 weeks ago

adorable, animal, animal behavior, behavior, cat, circling, fluffy, food, humor, round, shark
Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

2 weeks ago

12, business, business days, days, humor, me, nobody, outfit, parenting, preparation, put, snow, snow outfit, struggle, toddler, told, winter
I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

2 weeks ago

air, air fryer, appliance, cooking, discovery, feel, fire, first time, fryer, humor, i, just, kitchen, modern, modern appliance, time, tonight, used
Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

2 weeks ago

car, gas, humor, lord, prayer, put, request, stomach, take
Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

3 weeks ago

anticipation, crappy, decorations, festively, holiday, holiday light, humor, irony, life, light, lights, put, seasonal, wait
Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

4 weeks ago

body, body image, expectation, fashion, humor, image, jean, jeans, kick, skinny, skinny jean, skinny jeans, style

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Slack this month:

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Relationship status: the black mold in my shower thinks I’m cute.

13 shares on Reddit this month:

Love is in the air fryer.

95 shares on YouTube this month:

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

62 shares on Reddit this month:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

Architects should try and design a house with no yelling.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Why did they call it long distance running and not fardio?

79 shares on Discord this month:

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

Whenever I feel like I hate my job, I remind myself that I could be a food taster for the emperor.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Current state of politics: The circus is on fire but the monkey is fine.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

I’ve decided that I’m going to underthink today.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Imagine not sleeping with plushies. You guys are gonna get eaten by monsters.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

I’d rather you don’t watch me while I’m liking my own post.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Time machine? You mean a clock?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Born to be quiet and mysterious, forced to yap whenever I get the chance.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

(Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

Breaking via Facebook:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

Trending via TikTok:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Trending via Facebook:

Welcome to your 50s, you now take supplements to help your memory, but you can’t remember if you took them today.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

Keep the laugh going 😂

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨