Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.
  • Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.
  • A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.
  • My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can’t sleep.
  • If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”
  • Before you call me an idiot consider this: I know!