Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Maybe they finally realized that oversized, bumpy noses are so last season! 🍷👃 Time to embrace a new trend, like fruity cocktails with tiny umbrellas and perfectly symmetrical noses! 😂 #FashionForwardDrinking"

alcoholic, humor, i, know, never, nose, nostalgia, observation, old, weird

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

0

2 months ago

admiration, cup, drink, fruit, fruit tea, healthy, healthy lifestyle, humor, lifestyle, looks, red, tea, wine
If you can stand me, you deserve me!

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2 months ago

confidence, deserve, humor, me, relationship, self-esteem, stand
I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

0

2 months ago

every, frantic, glasses, great, i, morning, need, search, thing
I feel like a large portion of my adult life has been looking for an adult to do my adulting.

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5 months ago

adult, adult life, adulthood, adulting, feel, humor, i, large, life, life struggle, looking, portion, procrastination, responsibility, struggle
Miso soup is such a silly name, like “Yes, you so soup.”

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5 months ago

food, food name, humor, miso, miso soup, name, pun, silly, soup, wordplay, yes
What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

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2 months ago

bear, dark, dark humor, hope, humor, mauled, polite, polite way, sarcasm, someone, tell

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on YouTube this month:

Sorry, I can’t hang out tomorrow. I hung out with people a week ago and I’m still recovering from that.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

Do beavers even know what they’re doing, or do they just see water flowing down a river and think, “Absolutely not”?

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

42 shares on X this month:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

95 shares on Reddit this month:

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

A man outside Boots told me that Jesus died for my sins. Thanks for spoiling the end of the Bible. I was only up to the bit with the fish.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

If you are sad, just sing and you will realize that your voice is worse than your problem.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

It’s not my job to tell people where they’re failing in life. It’s just a hobby.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Why is there so much day left at the end of my patience?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

My husband thinks he can just order me around like he’s one of the cats.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I’m not like the other girls. I’m a 37 year old man.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via YouTube:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

Making waves on Telegram:

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Seen just now on Slack:

Being strange is exhausting.

Breaking via Telegram:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Live now on Twitch:

I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

It must be hard having an erectile dysfunction.

Just landed via Instagram:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

Making waves on Slack:

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

If you can stand me, you deserve me!

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

I feel like a large portion of my adult life has been looking for an adult to do my adulting.

Miso soup is such a silly name, like “Yes, you so soup.”

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨