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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

Funny alcoholic quotes

Funny alcoholic quotes 🍻 are the perfect way to toast to good times and laughter! Whether you’re winding down after a long day or spicing up a party, these witty sayings bring a splash of humor to every sip 🥂. Ready to sip, smile, and share some clever one-liners that celebrate the lighter side of life? Let’s raise a glass to laughter and unforgettable moments! 🎉🍹

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I like my men like I like my coffee, secretly alcoholic.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

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