New funny feel jokes

• “Why do I feel like shit all the time?” I ask myself, while staring into the flashlight that tells me bad news.

• I could be staring at my hand locking my front door, and I still won’t feel 100% sure my front door was locked.

• iPhone: I’m gonna update your software tonight while you sleep. Next morning, iPhone: I couldn’t do it, bro. Just didn’t feel right. Vibe was off.

• I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

• What’s a girl gotta do to feel a dopamine high around here?

• Asking a film guy, “Who is that?” when Tom Cruise comes on screen just to feel something.

• I’m gonna turn all this pain into something beautiful, like a poorly timed joke that makes everyone feel weird.

• Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

• Clicking on a suspicious link at work just to feel something.

• Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Top funny feel jokes

• Y’all ever feel like your mouth is stupid but your mind is smart? Like you’re intelligent but you can’t express it when you’re speaking? It’s so frustrating.

• Why does the weekend always feel like it lasts five minutes?

• Sometimes I feel like my life is being written by someone who isn’t sure if they like me or not.

• I feel like I’ve skipped the whole ‘go out and have fun’ stage and went straight to being an 80-year-old woman.

• Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

• I have no idea how dishwasher tablets work. I’ve already taken five of them, and I still don’t feel like doing the dishes!

• Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

• I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

• Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

• I stopped writing “Feel free to reach out if you need anything else” at the end of my emails because please don’t do that.

Popular funny feel jokes

• I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

• We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

• Pretty messed up that my body, a chemistry lab made of meat, simply chooses to make me feel a little bit nervous for no reason.

• Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

• Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

• I feel like my greatest accomplishment today has been not saying what I’m thinking out loud.

• I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

• Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

• I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

• I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

More funny feel jokes

• I personally feel like I have what it takes to become a fossil.

• I really feel like we need to have more fun in life, because literally nothing matters.

• Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

• Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

• If I’m giving you attention, feel blessed. My real passion is ignoring people.

• Accessories can really boost a woman’s self-confidence. For example, I know I would feel 10x sexier if I carried a sword with me at all times.

• I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

• Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.

• I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

• I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

Witty feel jokes

• I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

• I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.

• My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

• Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

• You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

• You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

• God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

• Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

• When you want to feel at your thinnest, walk through Walmart at any time of day.

• Jurassic Park came out decades ago, and now I feel like a fossil.