Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Maybe they could create a 'Couch Potato Olympics' 🛋️🏅🥔 for us skill-challenged folks! Who needs talent and patience when you have a remote control and unlimited snacks? 😂"

activity, creativity, fun, hobby, invention, leisure, patience, people, should, skills

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

0

2 months ago

anything, birthday, celebration, expectations, gift, government, humor, irony, knows, me, never
A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

0

2 months ago

Earth, humor, joke, Mars, overweight, person, perspective, planet, weight
I’m never single for too long, you gotta catch me while you can.

0

2 months ago

catch, confidence, dating, flirt, fun, humor, me, never, relationship, romantic, single, too
Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

0

2 months ago

age, clarity, clearer, getting, getting older, humor, i, older, perspective, photo, photo quality, quality, unfair, unfairness
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

0

2 months ago

beauty, beer, drinking, eye, holder, humor, perception, perspective
Thank you for the opportunity but I don’t think being human is a good fit for me. I’m going to go back to school to become an octopus.

0

2 months ago

animal, back, career, career change, change, education, fit, good, human, humor, me, octopu, opportunity, preference, school, thank

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

14 shares on Threads this month:

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

11 shares on Threads this month:

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t always have time to fold laundry, but when I do, I don’t.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

You know you’re over 50 when you have “upstairs Ibuprofen” and “downstairs Ibuprofen”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

What’s a good career for people with no motivation or talent?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Limiting my replies to introverts, wizards, freaks and vampires only.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

No more bare minimum, I want the moon and the stars. Maybe even a planet at this point.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Ordered a coffee, and the barista said, “Anything else?” and I almost said, “Stability.”

Making waves on Telegram:

Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Making waves on Discord:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I have so much to offer. It’s all bad, but still.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

What a strange day. And it has been for years.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

They should invent more hobbies for people without skills or patience.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

I’m never single for too long, you gotta catch me while you can.

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Thank you for the opportunity but I don’t think being human is a good fit for me. I’m going to go back to school to become an octopus.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨