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Being excited to get in bed really is a different level of adulting.

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My husband is looking for the remote control. I need everyone to stand up for a minute.

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Iโ€™m only dead on the outside.

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Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and Iโ€™m still alive.

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Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other peopleโ€™s content and nodding?

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Smile like a monkey with a new banana.

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Turns out I’m not an afternoon person either.

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Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

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The breathing exercises from the birth preparation course are only needed once the child has reached puberty.

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A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

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The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Commentary:
Ah, the spectrum of sizzling sexuality! ๐Ÿ˜ From raw and medium to well-done, let's hope it's not overcooked! ๐Ÿ”ฅ Remember, it's all about finding that perfect balance and sizzle in the bedroom steak of life! ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿฅฉ #MediumRarePlease



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