A moment of silence for everything I have to do but am not doing.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

A sperm bank implies the existence of sperm markets, which further implies the existence of high-frequency sperm trading.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.