Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Someone should bite my inner thighs just to see what type of noises I make. For science.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,663

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Mind if I crawl into your DMs and stay there for a while?

Just landed via X:

I’m so bored of being bored, because being bored is really boring.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I want to make you say, “Oh God,” in a way that makes God nervous.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Live now on Snapchat:

Girls be like, “I hate this man,” then have sex with him.

Trending via Facebook:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Live now on Discord:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

Freshly posted on X:

I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

Live now on Snapchat:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Spotted on Twitch:

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.

Calling someone a “tough cookie” is not a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew being tough could be so crumbly and dry? 🍪😅 Maybe we should stick to calling people 'soft cookies' instead! 😉 #ToughLove"

calling, compliment, cookie, humor, irony, sarcasm, someone, tough, tough cookie, worst, worst cookie

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems.

0

2 months ago

checking, day, emails, mindset, morning, problems, productivity, self-care, start, thing
Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

0

1 month ago

cry, day, easy, girl, guy, humor, relationship, stereotype, text
Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

0

1 month ago

angry, angry man, don’t, future, future house, home, house, humor, i, living, living situation, man, situation, things, things I don’t want, want
In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

0

2 months ago

bake, cooking, expectations, future, generations, grandma, humor, stereotypes, tattoo
Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

0

2 months ago

care, comfort, home, humor, i, relaxation, self-acceptance, ugly
“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

0

2 months ago

failure, imagination, least, things, well, worse

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on YouTube this month:

When two people argue online I believe whoever spells correctly.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

Men are very good at being women lately.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

15 shares on Threads this month:

Remember when we were kids and did everything we could to grow up? We were so stupid!

27 shares on Threads this month:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

40 shares on Twitch this month:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Unavailable” is my favorite state to be in.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

Not to be dramatic, but when I accidentally save a file twice and it adds that (1) at the end, it is the worst moment of my life.

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

80 shares on Telegram this month:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Acting jealous while secretly cheating is a pure talent of witchcraft.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

“Too much garlic”? What’s next? Too much love? Too much desire?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

“I’m great at saving money, as long as I don’t go anywhere, see anyone, or open my eyes.”

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Half of my problems are because I said “sure” instead of “no.”

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I do not want to have a career. I want to sit on the porch.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I need carpenters to remember that beds are also for sex. The aesthetics are great and all, but what is with all the squeaking?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Just shared via Telegram:

I am “I can’t remember the last time I went out on New Year’s Eve” old.

Seen just now on Threads:

Alexa, tell Roomba to get the spider.

Spotted on Discord:

Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

Just shared via Threads:

I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Trending via TikTok:

I have the body of a god. Sadly, it’s Buddha after brunch.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Shared recently on YouTube:

A big F*** YOU to people driving small cars and pulling deep into parking spaces so I think I have a spot until the last second.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Calling someone a “tough cookie” is not a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems.

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨