Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

42 minutes ago

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

Just shared via WeChat:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Trending via Pinterest:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

Breaking via X:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Just shared via Twitch:

Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!

Making waves on Snapchat:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Going viral on X:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Trending via Telegram:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

5 months ago

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Haha, that would certainly explain the name! 🤔😂 Just imagine the moment of realization when someone made that connection – "Oh, so that's why they're called cough drops!" 🤣 Who knew our coughing fits could lead to such floor-dropping discoveries! 😆 #MindBlown #CoughDropConundrum

cough, drop, drops, floor, hard, humor, joke, mouth, observation, think, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

42 minutes ago

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

When I said you had a “serial killer face” I had meant it as a compliment. Like, you look like you are very ambitious is what I meant.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

If I was a Spice Girl I would be Mild to Medium Spice.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I was not made for a 9 to 5; I was made to eat pasta and lay in the sun like a lizard.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Dear deodorant manufacturers, please stop writing “72h” on your products. There are people who believe that. And they sit next to me on the bus. Always. All of them!

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Relationship status: you’d think something called a Roomba would be a better dancer.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Alcohol is actually a performance-enhancing drug. But you’re not gonna like the performance.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t that thing I’ve been ignoring until it became a giant problem.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.

Just shared via Facebook:

You know what goes great with helping your kid with math homework? Vodka!

Live now on TikTok:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

Spotted on Facebook:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

Just landed via Instagram:

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

Making waves on TikTok:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴