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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

They should invent crushes that like you back.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Being flirted with while you’re on the clock feels like a hostage situation.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I have this epiphany every night that I need to turn it up a notch.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I like to listen to the national anthems during the award ceremonies. I’m into country music.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,271

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Trending via Messenger:

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’ve had two glasses of wine and responded with “Omgggg congrats, sweet girl” on an engagement post of someone I haven’t spoken to in 5 years.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

Making waves on Telegram:

Called in, “I’m a time traveler. I came in today yesterday.”

Making waves on Messenger:

Took a bunch of Ibuprofen to keep my posts from being too inflammatory.

Just shared via WeChat:

I love Pinterest. No opinions. No bad vibes. Just pretty pictures.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I wish I could throw tomatoes at comments.

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

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Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.
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Commentary:
"Everyone you know is fighting battles you don't know about, except for my neighbor who treats his battles like a live broadcast 📢🤦‍♂️. Seriously, his struggles have more airtime than an episode of a reality TV show! 😂 #NeighborDrama"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Instagram this month:

I like my women like I like my glasses: thick, transparent, and uneven.

16 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There used to be many different names for the childhood game of knocking on doors and running away. But these days, it’s simply referred to as ‘being an Amazon driver’.

99 shares on Twitch this month:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

54 shares on Discord this month:

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

84 shares on Messenger this month:

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not a parking garage that I can’t figure out how to get out of.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The breathing exercises from the birth preparation course are only needed once the child has reached puberty.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,554

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Olympic gymnast: does the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Announcer: Oh dear, that will be a point deduction.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

The only squat I’m even considering doing today is diddly.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

I hate this time of year because all you guys care about is football, and no one wants to ogle my cleavage anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I can cope well with most situations. Hearing someone smack is not one of them.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

America’s national anthem should be changed to Welcome to the Jungle.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via X:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Perfume is designed to be an invisible accessory. It’s not designed to instantly kill the canary when you entered the room.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

Making waves on Reddit:

Adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

If you go by “Toni,” I always think your full name is Rigatoni.

Just shared via Twitch:

Just the owls and I out here enjoying the breeze amongst the trees.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

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