Trendy Funny Quotes

  • When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.
  • If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.
  • I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.
  • I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.
  • I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.
  • When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.