15 funny green quotes - Wordgag

Avocado is just green butter.

May 24, 2026

Hey, I came over because the grass seemed really green here, but now that I’m looking back that grass actually looks crazy green, so I’m gonna go.

May 23, 2026

It’s a good thing that not everyone has a smartphone. We also need people who honk when the lights turn green.

May 23, 2026

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

May 23, 2026

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

May 22, 2026

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

May 22, 2026

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

May 20, 2026

Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

May 19, 2026

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

May 18, 2026

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

Apr 1, 2026

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

Apr 1, 2026

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Mar 31, 2026

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

Mar 31, 2026

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Mar 30, 2026

Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

Mar 30, 2026