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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Doing some skin care routine but my skin doesn’t care.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

The worst part of my grandfather’s dementia was slowly watching him forget about Dre.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I’ve noticed that when young people now talk about “old people”, they mean me.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Pirate: walks the plank. Someone’s dad: Is this teak?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

The goose: Canada’s most violent saxophone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

That moment when you clean the apartment and a year later everything is dirty again.

Spotted on Instagram:

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Making waves on Facebook:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Reported on Discord:

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

Breaking via WeChat:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Trending via Snapchat:

Sorry, but I don’t think we should see each other anymore. Your Katana skills are lacking.

Making waves on Twitch:

My life coach traded me.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

Going viral on Telegram:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

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11 Funny hr quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Special Offer: Save 100% when you don’t buy anything.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

They should have made a pool raft that looked like a broken door when Titanic was in theaters. I bet it would have sold millions.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

The eyes are the windows to the soul. A mustache is the front garden, and the mouth is that big pothole the council should do something about.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

If I say “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared research, data, charts and I will totally prove you wrong.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I used to think that the older you get, the wiser and more self-confident you become. I now know that you just get tired more quickly.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Just shared via Telegram:

Super excited about a brand new day of ignoring my problems.

Live now on Twitch:

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

Seen just now on Instagram:

Follow me on Instagram if you want to see me post absolutely nothing for weeks.

Just landed via Messenger:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

Trending via Slack:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Breaking via Discord:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

Breaking via X:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

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