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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Starting an OnlyFans, but it’s just videos of me trying to use chopsticks.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

In a previous life I may have been a carrier pigeon, in that all I ever think about is going home.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Snapchat:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Seen just now on Threads:

Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Trending via Slack:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media, like, why am I showing my life?

Just landed via Threads:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Going viral on Twitch:

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Trending via Instagram:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

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Funny light-hearted quotes

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All funny light-hearted quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

I’m seriously considering adoption. Who wants me?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Nose so runny it just signed me up for a 10k.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

Spotted on WeChat:

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

Live now on TikTok:

I was actually a little too thankful yesterday so today I’m going to even it out with some ungratefulness and entitlement.

Just shared via TikTok:

I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Before I die, I’m going to arrange for a friend to take my phone, and after the funeral, text everybody to say “thanks for coming” and other assorted messages of appreciation.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Just shared via Twitch:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you don’t know, with no teeth.

Breaking via YouTube:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Reported on Reddit:

Headache pro-tip: Bang your toe into something.

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m tired of being an adult. Therefore, I will be stepping down. Thank you!

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