Commentary:
Keith Richards is basically time's favorite recycling project! ⏳🕺🍸
Funny longevity quotes
Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?
Commentary:
Trying to finish a bottle of Worcestershire sauce is like playing a video game on expert level 🎮🕵️♂️🥫
My plan is to die young as late as possible.
Commentary:
"Forever young, but not a minute early! 🕒😎👴"
Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.
Commentary:
Ah, the good old days when "till death do us part" had a quicker turnaround time! 💍⏳ Seems like back then, even life sentence meant something else entirely! 😂 #MarriageForLifeButWhoseLife
According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.
Commentary:
Well, looks like the key to longevity might involve eating that extra slice of cake 🍰 and tuning out the unsolicited opinions of certain individuals 🤷♂️. Remember, nothing beats the power of a confident woman with a healthy appetite! 🙌 #LongLiveTheOverweightLadies
My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.
Commentary:
"Who needs vitamins and healthy living, when you have a healthy dose of spite and biscuits to keep you going strong until 90! 🍪😂 Granny's secret recipe for longevity! #SpiteAndBiscuits"