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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Kinda rude that your reward for struggling through stuff is still dying at the end anyway.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

The main cause of immigration is we’re still a country where people want to go, but we’re working on fixing that.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

The walk of shame, except it’s me at a bowling alley walking back to sit down after I knock down zero pins with bumpers.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Opening the web before 9am is crazy. Like, did you even try to have a good day?

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

Toddlers be like, we can do this the hard way or the harder way.

Going viral on Twitch:

Gonna vibe recklessly and call it “character development”

Going viral on Snapchat:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Anyone else smile at old people just to show that you’re one of the good ones.

Just landed via YouTube:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

Going bananas on Threads:

Maximizing rent value by turning ‘homebody’ into an Olympic sport!

Going bananas on Threads:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

Just shared via Facebook:

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

Funny original sin quotes

New funny original sin quotes 👇

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

1 month ago

atonement, bill, cell, cell phone bill, consciousness, creating, dad, family, humor, monthly, original, original sin, pay, phone, responsibility, sin

All funny original sin quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Messenger this month:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

I do believe in aliens, but do they also believe in me?

94 shares on Messenger this month:

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

45 shares on Pinterest this month:

Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

34 shares on X this month:

Due to the humidity, my hair has chosen violence.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.

23 shares on Threads this month:

Who needs a dominatrix when you can be beaten up by an automatically retracting vacuum cleaner cable?

75 shares on Telegram this month:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

89 shares on Instagram this month:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Money does not buy happiness, but it’s better to cry in a sports car than on a bicycle.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Terrible economy to ask a girl what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Someone at work just farted and I panicked and said ‘compliments to the chef’.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I never had a year with this much thinking. I’ve been thinking since the 1st.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Captain America taught me that I just need to take performance enhancing drugs to be loved by everyone.

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Funny original sin quotes

New funny original sin quotes 👇

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

All funny original sin quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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