Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Be nice today, the world is on fire.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Being an iPad baby must be so exciting. Imagine going from nine dull months in the womb to playing Candy Crush.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Me, one week before the new year: Not to brag, but I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the year.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Need to shave my legs again. Blow-drying takes far too long.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I’m living in a parallel universe where I suck at parking.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,274

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Going viral on Pinterest:

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

Trending via Threads:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Just landed via Telegram:

Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

Trending via Facebook:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

This year felt like being awake during surgery.

Trending via Pinterest:

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

Spreading quickly via X:

My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

Just shared via Messenger:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

Funny plume quotes

New funny plume quotes 👇

All funny plume quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Slack this month:

Being smart is a curse. You see the game, the lies, the patterns, but you still gotta play dumb to survive.

43 shares on Discord this month:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

41 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes I don’t have anything intelligent to say and sometimes I don’t let that stop me.

65 shares on Slack this month:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

79 shares on Telegram this month:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

62 shares on YouTube this month:

I changed my alarm clock sound to an applause, it’s the least I deserve for waking up at 7am.

45 shares on Discord this month:

An air mattress is the best way to tell your houseguests not to stay too long.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

Sometimes there is no way to debug besides staring at the code until you become enlightened.

15 shares on Slack this month:

A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

45 shares on TikTok this month:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I told you so. Kind regards, your gut feeling.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Anyone know how to grow a money tree?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

And to think I survived a global pandemic for this.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,406

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to open my phone tomorrow and find out what we’re mad about next.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I’m in my 20s, but somehow I’m 16 and also 55 at the same time.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with you.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

In a relationship with my bedroom fan.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Watching Jaws with my kid because I’m sick of going to the beach.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

Live now on X:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Spotted on Reddit:

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

Just shared via Slack:

How do I un-know people?

Trending via YouTube:

When I was a kid, we still ate noodles. Then at some point we ate pasta. Today, we only eat carbs.

Broadcasted on Threads:

A gambler is only called an addict when he loses.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

Spotted on Instagram:

I’m a people pleaser, unless you don’t like that. Then I’m not.

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