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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

It must be hard to be a rapper knowing at any moment your enemies may make beautiful poems about you.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I could tell my beard needed a trim when I started seeing some of the pictures my kids were drawing of me.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

The web is a great place to befriend people who you’d never let in your house.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

29 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I only sleep so my phone can get the night off.

Shared recently on YouTube:

How long are you allowed to hide in the bathroom during family visits?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

Just shared via Discord:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Just shared via Reddit:

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

Live now on Snapchat:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

Just landed via TikTok:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Going viral on Reddit:

The worst part about re-watching Home Alone is you just know Kevin’s parents bought this house for like $250K.

Making waves on X:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

29 minutes ago

Users Online

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Kinda sucks that the prize for washing your laundry is getting to fold your laundry.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

The weather forecast should include the percentage of answers blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

My kid asked me if I’ve ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd thing to ask considering I don’t have any kids.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

Live now on Instagram:

Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.

Just shared via TikTok:

You can’t have everything… where would you put it?”

Spotted on Reddit:

*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.

Just landed via Threads:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

Just landed via Reddit:

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Making waves on YouTube:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Spotted on Threads:

Much of my algorithm is based on when I paused while scrolling to grab a snack.

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