89 Funny pretty quotes

• Bands are always like “here’s another song”. Yeah, no shit, that’s pretty much all you do.

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  2 months ago

  always, another, band, entertainment, humor, much, music, performance, pretty, sarcasm, shit, song

• If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

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  2 months ago

  early, flirting, forecast, humor, i, ID, joke, leak, man, pretty, pretty woman, weather, woman, women

• My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

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  2 months ago

  am, boss, employees, humor, i, idea, incompetent, irony, job, management, me, obvious, pretty, train, wants, workplace

• According to my kids’ Christmas lists, they think this parenting gig pays pretty well.

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  2 months ago

  Christmas, expectations, family, gifts, humor, kids, lists, money, parenting, pretty, think, well

• One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

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  2 months ago

  airport, being, dad, family, faster, fun, humor, important, parenting, pretty, rest, travel, walking

• Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

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  2 months ago

  90, activity, aesthetics, decision, decision making, fun, fun activity, grape, grape variety, humor, label, making, pretty, pretty label, shopping, variety, wine

• I ate my exam paper. Which means that pretty soon I’ll pass the test.

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  2 months ago

  eat, exam, humor, i, means, paper, pass, pretty, school, soon, student, test

• I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

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  2 months ago

  age, appearance, eyesight, face, feet, hold, humor, i, just, know, menus, okay, pretty, reality, ruse, self-deprecation, think

• Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

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  2 months ago

  creativity, drug, drugs, game, good, humor, jokes, just, name, naming, oh, prescription, prescription drug, pretty, random, randomness, Scrabble, sounds, sure, word, word game

• Kanye is pretty mean for someone with ‘yay’ in their name.

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  2 months ago

  humor, irony, Kanye, mean, name, personality, pretty, someone, yay

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