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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

The goose: Canada’s most violent saxophone.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Flex on your kids by asking “are we there yet?” before they do.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

It’s a good thing that not everyone has a smartphone. We also need people who honk when the lights turn green.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

Updated

11 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Trending via Threads:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

Just landed via Slack:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Going viral on WeChat:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Breaking via WeChat:

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

Shared recently on X:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Just shared via WeChat:

God: “I genuinely don’t remember making you all this stupid.”

Shared recently on Slack:

Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

Updated

11 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I went for an interview at IKEA. The manager greeted me by saying “come in, make a seat”.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Liberté. Egalité. Second Coffeé.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I keep my mind active by worrying.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Spotted on YouTube:

They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

Shared recently on X:

You better pray to whatever god you serve that this email finds you before I do.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Going viral on Instagram:

I don’t know why we traded horses for cars. Your car won’t stop in front of a river and be like, “no way dumbass, we aren’t going to make that.”

Just landed via Twitch:

Damn, didn’t win the lottery. It’s messing up my budget plan.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Being an adult is when you ask the babysitter when you should be home.

Spreading quickly via X:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

Going viral on Instagram:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

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