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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

Anyone know how to grow a money tree?

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¬ has shared:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¨ has bookmarked:

I love that my dog always comes home from the groomer wearing a bandana. It’s like he was only gone for three hours, but joined a gang in that time.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

Spices were first brought to Western Europe in the Middle Ages. Some of them are still at the back of my cupboard.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ώ has shared:

Everyone’s an expert after the fact.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡» has copied:

Forget a dinner date, let’s go sit in court listening to people’s cases.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡¬ has shared:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,906

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

Just landed via Threads:

β€œOMG I love your personality,” thanks, it’s a disorder.

Spotted on Telegram:

One week of daily crunches and I have abs…urdly underestimated how long it will take to see results.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I think we should all try to spend more time online. It seems to be helping society.

Going bananas on Discord:

Source? It was revealed to me on a walk.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I personally get offended when rain is referred to as β€œbad weather.”

Going viral on Slack:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Spotted on Instagram:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Home Β» Funny Vow Quotes

Funny vow quotes

Funny vow quotes bring laughter and lightheartedness to those heartfelt wedding moments πŸ’πŸ˜‚ Whether you’re looking to break the ice or add a quirky twist to your big day, these witty words will have everyone chuckling and smiling πŸ˜„πŸ’¬ From playful promises to cheeky commitments, get ready to sprinkle some humor into your vows and make your celebration unforgettable! πŸŽ‰πŸ’‘βœ¨

New funny vow quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny vow quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes πŸ”₯

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,577

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡― has bookmarked:

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has shared:

Eat whatever you want. If someone calls you fat, eat them too.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡« has viewed:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

Before I work on myself, does anyone like me unhinged?

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Έ has copied:

If we all club together we could raise enough money to buy Monday and have it destroyed.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡± has bookmarked:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

And to my grandchildren, I leave my unread PDFs.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Reddit:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Spotted on LinkedIn:

A guy who never leaves his apartment so he can get the maximum value out of his rent.

Just landed via Instagram:

January feels like a schizophrenic episode.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

You can just make up words and if you say them in a Scottish accent, people will think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.

Trending via Threads:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

Just landed via Telegram:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Breaking via Instagram:

Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Spotted on YouTube:

Stopped using exclamation points in work messages so my coworkers know they’ve killed my spirit.

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